Defeating One's Reactive Nature
Re·ac·tive: acting in response to a situation rather than creating or controlling it. "a proactive rather than a reactive approach" What is the meaning of being reactive? It means that you react to situations through your emotions. Here, you can often come across as blaming, resentful, insecure, or angry. Some of us are more reactive in nature than others. While some appear to have a smooth, even, and balanced temper, others tend to react or overreact to the simplest of situations. For example, the other day I was cut in line at whole foods for the electronic check out. The guy who cut me didn't even see me waiting. You know what I did? Absolutely nothing! I did not react! I was not reactive! I let the man go and I even laughed to myself... because in reality... who cares? It was a simple mistake. However, there have been times in the past when I would've been annoyed. And other people, especially those who are on edge or those who are in a hurry may have approached the situation in a different manner. Some people may have even approached the man aggressively and with anger. I've actually witnessed petty arguments about who was first in line. Nowadays I simply laugh. I'm glad I don't get upset so easily!
I recently faced one of my biggest challenges in defeating my reactive nature. My 6 year old step daughter moved in with me! I was not used to be around children at all! I was not used to horrible messes that I had to clean up all the time... Nor was I used to having a child sneak into my bedroom while I was sleeping (meditating or praying). Nor was I used to having a child move my furniture all around the apartment! To make matters even worse, my step daughter can be a very stubborn and hard headed child since she was used to getting her way all the time when she lived with her mother and her grandmother. I've had a very difficult time getting her to listen to me and do what I tell her to do. My living situation had become unbearable. Yes, I had snapped on quite a few occasions. And I yelled at the poor child a few times. And then I got yelled at by her father for yelling at her. My apartment had become a war zone. I was baffled at just how reactive I had become and it upset me tremendously. So I immediately started to work on adjusting my attitude, temperament and patience.
One of the first things I started to do was take a few drops of CBD oil before leaving my bedroom every morning. Let me tell you... this regimen has worked absolute wonders for me... and everyone around me! Two simple drops of CBD oil in the morning has changed my nature almost entirely. As part of my morning prayers I began to recite the following (along with the Ana B'choach Miracle prayer) "I have perfect control over my thoughts, feelings, emotions and actions and I always think, feel and act in a positive, proactive and harmonious manner so that I may do my spiritual work." I believe that this affirmation has benefited me tremendously!
I also recite Hebrew Kabbalistic Prayers every morning. Some of these prayers are specifically focused on helping one to overcome their reactive nature. Here's a few of these prayers: The tenth morning blessing: Blessed are You, Hashem, King of the Universe, Who girds Israel with might. בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה יְהוָֹה, אֱלֹהֵֽינוּ מֶֽלֶךְ הָעוֹלָם, אוֹזֵר יִשְׂרָאֵל בִּגְבוּרָה: Baruch ata adonai elohenu melech haolam ozair Yisrael Bigvura
The thirteenth morning blessing: Blessed are You, Hashem, King of the Universe, Who did not make me a slave/ maid-servant...בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה יְהוָֹה, אֱלֹהֵֽינוּ מֶֽלֶךְ הָעוֹלָם, שֶׁלֹּא עָשַׂנִי עָבֶד: האשה אומרת: שִׁפְחָה
Baruch ata adonai elohenu melech haolam shelo asani aved/ shifcha
The Esh Tamid prayer/ meditation can be recited to disrupt and override negative thoughts. The 12 astrological signs dictate our instinctive reactive behaviors. The number 13 gives us control over the 12 signs, thus reciting The Thirteen Attributes gives us control over our reactive nature. Reciting Le Chai Olamim helps us to transform our reactive nature and become proactive, creating order out of chaos. Elohenu consists of 12 blessings that give us power to take control over the 12 signs of the zodiac and their negative influence on our lives. This gives us the strength to battle and conquer our negative reactive traits.
I recite the morning prayers daily. The other prayers usually get recited on Shabbat (Saturday morning.) Regardless, it all seems to be working out well for me! I've stopped yelling and I've stopped getting irrationally upset and angered all the time. I've become very calm! Thank the heavens! And I figured this all out just in time for my dad's last minute visit this week for Thanksgiving! Perfect! I will be loading up on CBD oil and lots of prayers! Til next time... Yes, it is possible to defeat your reactive nature! It's just mind over matter! Ask and you shall receive!
Jennie H is a Reiki Master Energy Healer, Co-Founder of Self Saviorz Society California Non-Profit 501(c)(3), Poet, Author and Entertainer with goals to help raise the vibration and consciousness of humanity!