My Answer is Always "Maybe, No Promises!"
Are you familiar with the saying "always keep your promises"? Perhaps your parents told you this... or a teacher or some other mentor in your life? Keeping promises builds trust. Well, what if I told you that there are people, like myself, that shouldn't even attempt to make promises. Allow me to explain further...
In the system of Human Design, a system of self-knowledge, there are those who have defined heart centers and others who have undefined heart centers. Individuals with defined heart centers make up approximately 37% of the population. Those with defined heart centers have consistent access to their willpower therefore they have no problem making and keeping their promises or resolutions. It's important that they do what they say they're going to do. Therefore they should only make promises that they can keep.
The other 63% of the population have undefined heart centers. They have no consistent energy to support making or keeping promises. They often get trapped in a vicious cycle. If they fail to live up to other people's expectations or fail to fulfill their commitments or promises, they end up making more promises in an effort to make up for their sense of self deficiency...only to fail again!
An undefined heart center is susceptible to amplification by a defined heart center's will power and can deceive itself into thinking it suddenly has the will to make and keep a commitment. However, this "borrowed" willpower evaporates as soon as the person with the defined heart center is not around. The mantra for an undefined heart center is "Never Make a Promise to Yourself or Others!" The undefined heart has nothing to prove to anyone under any circumstances!
We live in a society whereby most people have undefined heart centers! Therefore most people should not be making promises at all! Yet, somehow, there's always that person (most probably a person with a defined heart center) that's pressuring undefined heart center people to make promises that they can't keep. I happen to have an undefined heart center myself. And I've always intuitively known not to make promises to anyone. In fact, I never even expect anyone to make any promises to me! Because I know and understand quite well the uncomfortable feeling of being pressured into making a promise that I don't want to make...but at the same time I don't want to disappoint anyone!
My best guy friend of 20 years has a defined heart center. I can't tell you how many arguments we've had because I reluctantly agreed to do something that I wasn't sure I was able to do or even wanted to do. Most of our arguments have been time related. He would ask me to drive him somewhere at a certain time. I would agree, but when the time came I wasn't ready to leave. Then he would get angry and start pressuring me and telling me that I was a terrible person because I couldn't keep my promises. I would get anxiety...sometimes even panic attacks!
I learned my lesson! No more promises! Turns out, not only do I have an undefined heart center, but I'm a splenic projector which means that besides not making promises, I shouldn't be planning anything in advance. Everything I do should be spontaneous and in the moment! This explains why I can't work a 9-5 job or promise to drive my friend somewhere at a certain time. If I don't adhere to these rules then life becomes beyond stressful for me... And then I get sick!
One day, after reading about my undefined heart center, I gave my friend a speech. I told him that from now on the answer is ALWAYS "Maybe!" "I don't know". "No promises". "Let's see how the day goes"! Thank goodness for human design! Now my friend understands my dilemma. He realizes that I can't make promises... and it has nothing at all to do with him! I must follow my human design if I want to be happy, healthy, comfortable and live my life optimally. Ofcourse he still jokes and says I have an excuse for everything... but I think Human Design is a pretty good excuse!
Having trouble keeping promises? Are you getting pressured into making promises that you don't even want to make and know you can't keep? You may have an undefined heart center! Get your free human design chart here. It may be time for you to stop making promises! You'll feel much happier and less stressed out! My new rule of no promises has helped me tremendously! You may wish to incorporate this rule into your life as well! Til next time... Live life by your rules... not by other people's rules and expectations! Life will become much easier and much more enjoyable!
Jennie H is a Reiki Master Energy Healer, Co-Founder of Self Saviorz Society California Non-Profit 501(c)(3), Poet, Author and Entertainer with goals to help raise the vibration and consciousness of humanity!